I fucked Mariah

Buildin Stuff

2009-11-29T16:17:00.000-08:00

IFM - Censored Material

2009-11-24T20:57:00.001-08:00

The following graphics were designed for the GRAND finale, but we ultimately decided to go in a different creative direction...

Dance Rehearsal - Fantasy

2009-11-24T12:06:00.000-08:00

Beautiful - Dance Rehearsal

2009-11-24T12:05:00.000-08:00

The Gift

2009-11-23T12:32:00.000-08:00

At the end of the play, John gives Mariah a gift. Here is the first draft as drawn up by Stefan Danicich.

When it's done, it should look like this, only, much, much larger.

teachin ography

2009-11-22T19:29:00.000-08:00

make it ooze. gimme that goo.

Final Dance Rehearsal This Sunday

2009-11-19T20:14:00.000-08:00

Our Final Dance Rehearsal is this Sunday... we will be in a studio at Dance New Amsterdam... but after that, we move to the theatre for our remaining rehearsals! I should have some new videos on Sunday.
Until then... OG Freestyle!

IFM Rehearsal Highlights / week 4

2009-11-08T19:52:00.000-08:00

For some reason I tried to teach the IFM dancers the "thriller" routine to a Paul Simon song... it didn't work, so we killed it. I guess I had this idea that Paul Simon could be cool if we broke it down thriller style in the middle of an MJ routine, but it's so fucking white and dorky. You can sort of hear the guitar riff for the Paul Simon song at the end of this video clip. White and dorky!

This week the ladies brought high heels to see how it would affect the choreography for the club scene. It definitely looks hot, but I still think that there's more goo and ooze that could be coming out of it. Goo and Ooze!!

2nd dance rehearsal

2009-10-25T17:37:00.000-07:00

This show... it's going to knock your socks off. Just be sure to get VIP tickets...
tickets now available at robopsicle.com

Sofi Lambert to star in "I Fucked Mariah"

2009-10-24T10:50:00.000-07:00

After just a few weeks in New York, French-Canadian actress Sofi Lambert has landed the title role of Mariah in this December's World Premier of "I Fucked Mariah." The role, which was originally offered to fashion icon Natasa Vojnovic back in August, was always intended to be played by a foreigner so that there was less focus on the actress' ability to impersonate Mariah, and more focus on her ability to tell the story of our complex relationship. Sofi is a pleasure to work with, and something tells me that with the right wig and a little styling... she's really going to look the part.

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Ray Chao to play Mariah Carey's Orgasm

2009-10-24T10:46:00.001-07:00

In this very exciting casting update, accomplished New York film and theatre actor and Chicago native Ray Chao is set to play the pivotal role of Mariah Carey's orgasm in December's production of "I Fucked Mariah." This is not the first, nor last, non-traditional role of Ray's career. He can also be seen this December as Lady Capulet in a Lesbian, (that's right, lesbian, NOT thespian) version of Romeo & Juliet.

Additional Casting News

2009-10-18T17:00:00.000-07:00

Some additional dancers have joined IFM!

First, I would like to introduce the lovely Yuuka! At only 19, she is the youngest cast member, but she's accomplished a lot by coming all the way from Japan to study dance full time in NYC. I couldn't be happier to have this bright, energetic star as a part of IFM.

Next is Ashlie... where do I begin? Ashlie is an internationally educated performer and professional in the fashion industry. From teaching hip-hop to designing clothing to reality tv and working for the world's top designers, there's nothign she can't do. But above all of these, Ashlie has amazing presence and personality. I know her energy will help bring the diverse cast of dancers together. "I Fucked Mariah" is Ashlie's second robopsicle.

When Anne told me she wanted me to meet Hiroko, I couldn't believe it was the very same women whose freestyle I was checking out in Robin Dunn's hip-hop class the night before and thinking that I wish she was in my show... This Japanese native is here studying dance and brings great energy and style to the show!

Finally, our newest adition to the cast of "I Fucked Mariah" is Gilie. I met the West African performer in my hip-hop class over a year ago, but never forgot her ability to pick up movement with great passion and intensity. I can't wait for her to meet everyone at this Sunday's rehearsal. Along with Sofi, she is the casts second French speaker. Giving rehearsals three dominant languages: English, French and Japanese!

Rehearsal Highlights 1

2009-10-18T16:48:00.000-07:00

Here are some videos from our very first rehearsal!!!

above ography by anne and john

above ography by anne

Casting News 3

2009-09-13T12:19:00.000-07:00

Shari Rosenblatt joins the cast of "I Fucked Mariah" as one of 8 dancers.

I met Shari when she started attending the hip-hop class I teach Sunday's at Stepping Out Studios. She is a fantastic mover with great presence and energy. She currently works as a therapist in Chelsea where she has lived for over 20 years.

Only 4 more dancers to be announced...

Casting News 2

2009-09-12T16:58:00.000-07:00

Gilleon Smith joins the cast of I Fucked Mariah as one of eight dancers.

This sassy Californian is a veteran of the stage both as a dancer and actress, and most recently as a producer for the Fringe Festival's hit show "Dolls" which was just extended for two weeks. Smith recently shot her first topless scene in a film that debuted at HBO's New York International Latin Film Festival. When she is not acting, Smith is working on her new business, Actor's Lifestyle.

20yo Anne Marsen to co-choreograph IFM

2009-09-11T18:10:00.000-07:00

At the age of just 20, Anne Marsen has established herself as a unique talent. Her creative moves and stylized choreography will be showcased in I Fucked Mariah's many ensemble numbers. She will also appear onstage as one of the cast's eight dancers. Hip-Hop, Contemporary and African are just some of the influences that will be evident in the show's pieces.

Her nasty freestyle can be seen in Jacob Krupnick's "Moves" video installation:

Moves (original soundtrack) from jacob krupnick on Vimeo.

check her out at 5:45 followed by some of my moves.

CASTING NEWS 1

2009-09-11T18:05:00.000-07:00

Sou Chanthirat to join the cast of "I Fucked Mariah" as one of eight dancers. More news about the North Carolinan beauty and the other seven dancers to come in the next weeks...

IFM IS COMING TO PS160 IN DECEMBER 2009!!!

2009-09-04T13:02:00.001-07:00

In the words of Michael Jackson, THIS IS IT!

We have a venue! And it's massive.

The Flamboyan Theatre (PS160) is a retired middle school that was converted into an art space with various venues, including three theaters. Flamboyan is the largest of the three, and will easily accommodate the 125 guests per show I had hoped for.

The dates will be confirmed next week, but it's looking like Dec. 10-13 (possibly Dec 3-6).

Decembers in New York tend to be chilly... but December 2009 just got HOT!

Look into flights to New York now!

NATASA FINDS THE PROJECT TO BE "VERY INTERESTING"

2009-09-04T12:58:00.000-07:00

This is Natasa Vojnovic:

http://www.showstudio.com/project/politicalfashion/movies/2008-04-25/

For quite a few months now, Natasa has been my muse for the scriptwriting process, and my ideal casting select for Mariah.

She would bring the publicity, sexiness and intensity to the story that I desired.

When I met her, she was a model who was interested in theatre. We got along well, so I did not feel shy bout offering her a role in this tiny project.

As it turns out, she is seriously developing herself as an actress and involved in many, presumably larger, acting projects.

She is therefore not available for this one. She and her agent were 100% gracious about my proposal. Natasa said she thought the project was "very interesting," and she was incredibly honored.

I hope to have her at the show and convince her to work with me on my next project...

WE BELONG TOGETHER

2009-04-12T15:40:00.000-07:00

Just to clarify, I am working on a non-fiction play called "I Fucked Mariah" (IFM.)

Please take a look at the video for "We Belong Together" (2005.)

div>

Mariah's massive 2005 single "We Belong Together" was her version of the story.

I felt it was time to tell mine...

VINTAGE I

2009-02-26T14:49:00.000-08:00

the japanese characters... reminds me of the tragic experience we "shared" in tokyo together. Was the worst 48 hours of my life. I'm really sorry to say this but I don't think I'll ever be able to go back to that country...

POSTER 1.0

2009-02-22T21:17:00.000-08:00

SMOKIN' SOMETHIN'

2008-05-25T14:15:00.000-07:00

Regarding rumors that there was no pre-nup, Mariah said:

"Anyone who thinks there was no pre-nup is smokin' somethin'"

Listen. Mariah Carey does not fuck around when it comes legal stuff. She has a team of 6 full time lawyers and a second team of 12 lawyers to watch the first 6.

When I showed up at the door of her recording studio in Capri claiming to be a reporter from (I claimed to be a reporter for Corriere Della Sera), I had to agree to a grocery list of “terms.”
I met with one of her layers, Mr. Gary, who I got to know quite well during our relationship.
But that was only the beginning.

When we first started fooling around, you know, things get to a certain point, clothes come off, your holding each other, you’re kissing, and all of the sudden she would stop and give me this look as though I was forgetting something.
“What’s wrong baby?”
“You know…”
“No, I don’t know.”
“You didn’t sign the papers yet.”

Mr. Gary slid the papers under the door, and as I sat on the edge of the bed signing them as fast as my little wrist could manage, she went in to the bathroom which was connected to the master bedroom. While she was in there, I could hear her talking to someone. It was one of her assistants, her leg oiler, who was actually greasing up her legs before we went to third base.

We had our first argument when she came out of the bathroom. I told her that the lawyer and the leg greaser had completely ruined the mood.

We compromised, as this is the key to any harmonious relationship. I would sign anything her lawyer asked me to, and when she was with me, she would remain a natural – no grease, no oil.

The blowjob agreement was only the beginning.

I also had to sign something that swore me to silence for five years after our last interaction.

A small price to pay when you’re fucking Mariah.

THE TATTOO

2008-05-25T14:02:00.000-07:00

Someone recently wrote the following note on my Facebook wall:

“on a scale of 1 to livid, how angry are you that Mariah is married to Nick Cannon? Not only that but the fact that they got branding tattoos.”

First of all, that’s the sickest fucking tattoo I’ve ever seen in my life. I WISH I had had the balls to get a tattoo like that when I was fucking her. People might say to Nick, you know, marriages don’t last forever. But guess what, the fact that you fucked Mariah Carey DOES. It lasts for fucking ever. For ever ever. And it never get's old

Coolest tattoo ever.

FUCKING RETARDED

2008-05-25T13:58:00.000-07:00

To know somebody six weeks and get married… is so desperate.
Every relationship is great for the first six weeks - they’re still getting to know each other. There is no way this is going to go smoothly. Fortunately for us, it’s going to play out right in front of our faces. And this blog will be there every step of the way.

The Red Line

2007-02-22T09:25:00.000-08:00

I was on the red line today going to Times Square, and out of the corner of my eye I see this guy get on my car, and I can just tell by the way he is waddling on with a cane that he is some sort of beggar, which, believe me, there is no fucking shortage of in New York. And sure enough he walks to the center of the car and starts his announcement,
"Scuse me ladies and gentlemen. I'm very sorry to interrupt you for this brief announcement, but I have had a full hip replacement and I have trouble walking. I wish I could be working right now. I had a stroke this January and my health does not allow me to work yet. It brings me great embarrassment to be here. Maybe some of y'all can help me out."
Nobody moves. No one ever does. I can't understand why so many people do this bc I never see them get any help. I certainly don't give to panhandlers, because that's how you generate more fucking smelly panhandlers. But this guy keeps going,
"I was a Vietnam vet."
And I'm beginning to wonder, "Is he just going to keep adding shit on until he gets something?"
"Just decades ago I was in charge of millions of dollars worth of equipment, and dozens of men. Now I'm reduced to begging for pennies on the subway."
But he didn't stop there.
"In 1988 I ran for city council in Queens. I was elected democratically, and was in charge of various important duties. Now my vision is poor in both eyes, and it is difficult for me to read the important documents I once read. But I cannot afford glasses. Nor food. So if any of you have some spare food you could share with me today."
I am generally willing to give spare food, rather than money, to panhandlers. Especially if I know it will go to waste. But I had no food.
"On September the 11th, 2001, I was near the World Trade Center, and I helped rescue many women from ground zero, and took them to safety. Now I have difficulty breathing."
And you could see as some people began reaching for pennies and spare change to put in his hat, as his story got more and more desperate. And I wondered what my breaking point would be. What would it take for me to give this man a dollar?
"In the 1990's, I fucked Mariah Carey on at least four separate occasions. Now I cannot fuck, because I am homeless and unshowered and no one will fuck me."
That's what it would take. Because I have also fucked Mariah Carey. And because we are not an enormous group of brothers who have fucked her, I will help this man, my brother, out with one dollar today.

Even celebrities who look great in photos have insecurities in the bedroom.

2007-02-01T20:31:00.000-08:00

People sometimes ask me what I did to make Mariah so obsessed with me.
“Why did she fall so head over heals with you?”
And I tell them that I think it was something I said to her that first night when we were both naked together. She was a little apprehensive about taking her clothes off and she told me she felt fat when she was naked because her curves were, “let loose.” She only liked to have sex with her bra on yada yada yada. And that’s when I said to her,

“You are a huge woman. Your voice is huge. Your career is huge. Your fanbase is huge. Your legacy is enormous. Your award collection is huge. So you’ve got big curves to back up the huge life you’ve made for yourself? Be proud, for god’s sake. It shouldn’t be any other way. You shouldn’t feel ashamed. Especially not with me. I’m here to love you, not judge you.”

Fuck all that airbrush shit. Even celebrities who look great in photos have insecurities in the bedroom. I loved seeing Mariah’s flaws. Her legs are not shiny and glossy, they’re real. Real legs. And her breast fucking haaaaaaang… but in a great big Beautiful way.

Anyways, as soon as I said that to her, she let loose. She got so comfortable with me, to the point where she would take her top off while we were just eating French fries. It was awesome.

ODB

2007-02-01T19:55:00.000-08:00

She used to talk about Old Dirty Bastard all the freaking time. Non-stop. It was like she was trying to impress me, because she knows I love the Wu-Tang Clan. But she never really said anything of significance about him, or any details about the time they spent together. It was always,

“Oh, he was so amazing, I miss him so much.”
Or
“I cherish the time we spent together.”

And getting very sentimental about him. So I started to wonder, “Did Old Dirty Bastard do Mariah?” Because Mariah is very sentimental about fucking. And if she was trying to make me jealous, it didn’t work, because she never really hinted as to whether they fucked or not, but even if she had said, “He fucked me like a dirty bastard.” It wouldn’t have made me jealous, it just would have made me proud, to know I had been somewhere one of my heroes had been. Plus that makes the fact that I fucked Mariah Carey even cooler, like, look at her list:
That old fuck
Old Dirty Bastard
Me.

Awesome.

So, if anyone reading this knows more details about the relationship between ODB and MC, plz post a comment.

Pudding

2007-02-01T19:52:00.000-08:00

People often ask me for proof that I fucked Mariah. I say, "THe proof is in the pudding." What that means is, Mariah is coming out with 2 albums this year. She never came out with 2 albums in one year before meeting me. I gave here that. That was me. That's why she's back. She was really crazy for a while there. Trust me.

Mariah saves Africans.

2007-01-28T18:29:00.000-08:00

http://www.mariahcarey.com/news/news.php?uid=1854

Click here to see the story about Mariah Carey helping Africans.

Coming Soon. My TRUE STORY about Mariah Carey.

2007-01-28T18:22:00.001-08:00

THis blog will document the actual relationship I had with Pop star Mariah Carey while I was living in Corsica, Italy.

2007-01-28T18:22:00.000-08:00